Corktree, I was just trying to point out that with your poll I had a chocie of being completely comfortable with both genders doing whatever, or having a total extreme double standard that carried over into everything and required no social conventions being expected for girls. So having a slight double standard wasn't an option. The fact is I have insisted that my daughter wear a skirt/dress for certain events because it was formal or church dress.I'm guessing that a LOT of people have a similar slight double standard (if their girl gave a report and dressed as Columbus they'd be ok with it, but if their boy wanted to be Elizabeth I for an oral report they would discourage it), so I was disappointed that it wasn't there as an option.Some of us aren't out there trying to tear down all gender cross dressing barriers. I am, however, very willing to tell my kids that pink is just a color and males and females can have the pink cup at the dinner table. I am not, however, going to dress my boys in pink. Sorry.ESO, I agree with your assessment of the Daphne situation. If my child wanted to back out of the costume for whatever reason (too ugly, too lame, too itchy, too scary, too immodest, too girly) I wouldn't have bought them another costume but I would have offered to help them find something at home or borrow something they would be happier with or fix the costume they had to make it more comfortabe/appropriate/modest/flattering, etc.